Sometimes, it looks like this…

Mychael has started going to back to work very part time. She is a nurse and works about 2 weekends a month. She pretty much stayed at home 24-7 for about the last 4 years.

This weekend, she worked two twelve hour shifts–Saturday and Sunday, both 11-11. So, I was home with all three “littles” and “Gam” (my mother in law).

Here’s what I had on the list of stuff I wanted to do for Saturday:

  1. Run
  2. Feed all the animals
  3. Clean entire house (straighten, floors, kitchen, bathrooms)
  4. Laundry (done, folded, put away)
  5. Make lunch
  6. Run to store for a few items (we live pretty far out so a run to the store is at least an hour round trip)
  7. A few camper repairs (of course)
  8. Water garden
  9. Feed animals
  10. Make dinner
  11. Prayers/read books/bed time

And then, for Sunday:

  1. Run
  2. Feed animals
  3. Church (our church is almost 2 hours away)
  4. I had some tools get left out in the rain, so I wanted to fix that situation
  5. Trash down to the road (out here it’s a bit more involved than you might think)
  6. Water garden
  7. Feed animals
  8. Make dinner
  9. Prayers/read books/bed time
  10. Iron uniform

Gam was sick with some kind of stomach thing, so although she was a trooper, she was definitely less help than usual. I got through the entire list on Saturday. My daughter got stung by a wasp on the church playground and so we gave her benadryl in the evening. And although it all got done, by the end of this evening, prayers looked like this:

The censer broke. I was trying to read the prayers on the counter while holding the little guy in one hand.  I lost my place in the prayer book. I totally blanked on how to say “In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit” in Serbian. My daughter was strung out on benadryl. My middle son wanted to play cowboy in front of the icon wall. I recorded it because I knew it was going to be stupid.

When I am home with them on weekends, I get it done, but I am quite a bit more militant about the timeline. I have an operations order slide deck complete with decision points, lines of effort and all the various paragraphs in mind. I have contingency operation plans when courses of action A, B and C don’t pan out. The mission gets accomplished or we die trying.  I drive my kids crazy. Mychael will come home tonight around midnight with the kids all asleep in their beds, the house clean, and all the laundry done and put away to start a new week.

Dads. Do what you have to do to get it done. There is no “alpha” way to do this.


7 thoughts on “Sometimes, it looks like this…

  1. Scott, thank you for giving a realistic account of a day in the life of a dad with little kids. My wife and I have four, all under the age of eight. So, I feel ya man. My wife has a serious Auto-immune disorder, meaning there are good days when she is normal and bad days when she’s in a lot of pain and can’t do much. On those days I put on my Mr. Mom hat and buckle down for dishes, laundry, changing diapers, et al.

    It all makes me feel slightly less than manly, but….what else can you do? Someone has to hold down the fort. Besides, as long as I’m providing for my family I’m doing my job, and I take pride in that.


  2. Scott – see you are headed for Montana in the near future. I’ve not read all you’ve written so perhaps you’ve already said. But – will you be near a Serbian or Orthodox community in Montana?


  3. “Dads. Do what you have to do to get it done. There is no “alpha” way to do this.”
    Right there. Sometimes you gotta GSD (Get Shit Done). Comes part in parcel of being part of a family.

    Much respect.


  4. Great post! I enjoy day-in-the life tales. This one I can relate too. We have a little business that I run. Most of the time I can fit it in around schooling but there are weekend days every few weeks that I need to spend extended hours on it. That means my husband steps in my place.

    We have really embraced it. It feels like “me” time because I am by myself which rarely happens. I get a recharge. We both like the financial benefit.

    He likes it because he gets the kids to himself. He travels for work a lot. Last weekend he lived out a long time dream of making chocolate cake for his kids for breakfast. It came from that old Cosby album. He went through the whole routine up till the wife got mad. The kids reaction was priceless. I love how my husband does some things differently than me. In lots of ways better! I come out of the basement office to a clean house and clean, fed and happy kids ready for bed an hour early.

    A couple of years ago I found all these blogs about men being so angry about feminism and even women’s natural inclinations in general. The anger makes me feel weird because I am not sure what the answer is. There many good points to be made about women and feminism but I don’t agree with all of it.

    I appreciate your point of view because you present your marriage honestly in a positive light. I enjoy seeing the love.


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